Diana:
Oh, ok. What about joseph Gordon-Levitt? He seems like he’d be really fun to like, do philanthropic projects with or something.
Rhune:
Um, I’d bang his little butthole. Watch out for that snake.
Diana:
I hate snakes. What about Harrison Ford?
Rhune:
No, no.
Diana:
Really? He’s so handsome and classic.
Rhune:
Just kidding, I’d bang his little butthole.
Diana:
Really, Rhune? There’s so much more to life than banging buttholes. I can’t think of any more boys right now.
Rhune:
You ran out?
Diana:
Yeah, my thinking cap’s not on hard enough. Ow.
Rhune:
Don’t touch that cactus. Don’t.
Diana:
That’s like when somebody hands you a hot plate of food and tells you “It’s hot, don’t touch it,” you have to touch it anyway just to understand what their version of hot is.
Rhune:
Hot means hot. We should go around this little town.
Diana:
It’s cute.
Rhune:
It looks like trouble.
Diana:
I love trouble. Speaking of trouble, what would you do with Robert Downy Jr.?
Rhune:
Bang his little butthole.
credits
from Squirrelmageddon,
released September 27, 2017
Written and Performed by Rhune Kincaid and Diana Van De Kamp